


Armageddon, The Declaration of Independence, and A Dragon

by ughdotcom



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Ace! Remy, Alternate Universe - Different World Setup, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Human, Angel! Patton, Angst with a Happy Ending, Armageddon, Body Dysphoria, Deceit's name is Dalyn, Don't copy to another site, Dragons, Emile has a wheelchair, Genderfluid Character, Homophobia, If Night Vale was the world, Monster! Deceit, Other, Shapeshifter! Nico, Sympathetic Deceit Sanders, Thievery, Transphobia, Winged! Logan, Winged! Virgil, trans! Roman, well kinda
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-27
Updated: 2019-08-13
Packaged: 2020-05-20 13:07:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 13,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19377328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ughdotcom/pseuds/ughdotcom
Summary: The world is strange.People are stranger.Logan just wants to defy his dad. Virgil doesn't want to marry. Roman wants to run away with his boyfriend. Patton wants to help the two attractive man he met on the road. Dalyn wants some money.Will they get what they want? Not all of them.





	1. Basic History - Backstories and U.S. Government

Logan Carter lived in Grand Sumva. It was a town, but it had a king. That didn’t make sense, but neither did Grand Sumva. It was just the way of things.

 

Grand Sumva also had a prince. Logan was that prince, and his dad was King George. King George didn’t like his name, because he thought that his citizens might connect it to the evil king who had rule over the U.S. before King Ezekiel did. He didn’t connect it to the first king of the U.S., so maybe King George viewed himself as evil more than good. (Or maybe he just cared a lot about other people’s impression. Or he was just an idiot. Knowing King George, it was probably all three.)

 

None of them did. Most of them weren’t even aware they lived in the U.S. They just lived in Grand Sumva. That meant that either King George’s brainwashing plan worked, or that people were just really, really stupid. It was most likely the latter.

 

Logan didn’t like Grand Sumva all that much. All the people he associated with just wanted to be his friend because he was the Prince, except for his best friend.

 

Logan’s best friend was Remy Ahmed. Remy was on the royal guard, but he wasn’t really a knight. He had a sword, but all he did was stand there at the entrance to a cave. He didn’t know what they were guarding. Most of the knights didn’t. They just stood there for their shift.

 

Grand Sumva had an important role to play in the universe, however. For in that cave lay the key to starting Armageddon. It also was guarded the exact same way most important american artifacts were guarded, but this is not important.

 

But now I’ve peaked you interest. Are all american artifacts protected by guards, and only guards? You wonder. The answer is no. There is a system of traps. I cannot tell you what the traps are, but one of them includes water. Holy water, so that no prince and no human could cross it. Only the least pure of creatures, so impure that holy water thinks they are just an erotic book. Probably one with pedophilia or incest. Those are the most evil books, just as wasps are the most evil insect. But that is for later.

 

But Logan Carter is not the only hero of this story. No story is complete without a love interest, except for the ones that are. But this story has four of them.

 

One of those was named Virgil Ramirez. As I mentioned above, the U.S. is run by a king named Eziekiel. But of course this is common knowledge. Everyone knows the story about how King George III ruled the U.S. and a new King George, George Washinton took over. We learned that in… what? Not kindergarten, no, but maybe first grade? Whenever we learned it, it still stands that it is common knowledge and it should be known by you, the reader, already. But who am I to say? You could have found this and live in another country. Or be from a different planet. Or even another universe, where the U.S. is a democracy, like the U.K. What a silly idea. We all know King Washinton would never give up the chance to be king.

 

But Virgil was the son of King Eziekiel, and so he was the prince of the U.S., and technically Grand Sumva, despite Grand Sumva having its own king. Most desert towns have their own king, except for that one exception, Night Vale, that has a mayor, of all things! What a backwards little town.

 

Virgil didn’t have any friends either, but he did have a boyfriend, and that’s even better. He and Roman Prince had fallen in love when Virgil, disguised as a person instead of a prince (it was relatively easy, just dress out of the robes and cover the wings), had met him and they had robbed a bigot together. It was love at first revenge.

 

Roman Prince was a simple person. A simple person who happened to be secretly dating a prince. He had a father, and a mother, like most people in a heteronormative society do. He also had a brother. He didn’t like his brother much. Remus ate deodorant. Everyone knows that’s to be boiled down as seasoning, not eaten plain. Remus had also changed his last name to Duke, in some rebellious streak. Be grateful he doesn’t show up much in this story. Be very grateful.

 

Patton Watson lived relatively close to the capital, New York City. He lived in Jersey City, New Jersey. As we all know, Jersey City is home to The Hearts, a group of kind people who go around being kind. Patton was part of this group. It was hard, and Patton had nearly been arrested four times. Patton didn’t care, however. He was going to spread happiness and cheer.

 

Dalyn Perez lived nowhere. He was a bandit. He made his living traveling around looking for work. So had his ex best friend, Remus, who had probably returned home, scared. It was easier for Remus because remus looked white. Dalyn hated the thought of Remus Duke. He had stabbed Dalyn in the back - figuratively and literally - and ran off, probably home to cry to his mother. Dalyn would never be so weak. He couldn’t afford to, nor did he have a mother. Not everyone had that privilege, Remus.

 

Wow, I’m sorry. I promised Remus wouldn’t be in this much, but I’ve mentioned him several times! I promise he’s not important. He’s just a small connection between Roman and Dalyn. A plot point, or he would be, if this was a book, or a podcast, or a movie. But this isn’t. This is real life.

 

But how do we know? Maybe we are just fiction in another universe. Maybe. But probably not. As we all know, writers would never use the name Dalyn. It looks like it should be pronounced Dallon, not Day-lynn. It would be too much trouble.

 

No. This is reality. This is true. And this is the story about five boys, Armageddon, The Declaration of Independence, and a dragon.


	2. Only Monsters can Touch Holy Water

“We need your help, Bandit.” Said one of two men. One was tall, and the other was short. They stood over Dalyn, who was tied up on the floor.

 

Dalyn struggled against his bonds. He was starting to think stealing from these two guys was a bad idea, but their money pouches were bulging. He was a thief. He couldn’t resist. “I have a name, you know.”

 

“Most everyone does. But we don’t care. We need your help stealing something.”

 

“How much do you pay?”

 

“A lot.”

 

“Hundreds?”

 

“Thousands. We need you to steal the Declaration of Independence.”

 

“I thought artifacts were protected with holy water.”

 

“That’s why we need you, thief.” The tall one leaned over, grinning, showing off yellowed teeth. “You’re a monster.”

 

“Well that’s going a bit far.”

 

“Take off the makeup.” Tall said to Short.

 

“What!” Dalyn said, but it was too late. The scales coating the side of his face shone in the light.

 

“Fuck you.” He spit in Short’s face. Short just wiped his face.

 

“I don’t like this one.”

 

“We need him.” Tall leaned over to Short and whispered in his ear.

 

“Of course.” Short frowned at Dalyn, but he did nothing more. Tall pressed a kiss to Short’s cheek in reward.

 

“That’s so cute. Can you untie me?”

 

Tall scowled but undid the knots.

 

Dalyn picked up his hat and set it back on his head. “Thank you gentlemen. I’ll hear your business proposal now. My name is Dalyn Perez. And yours?” Dalyn dusted off his clothes casually as he spoke.

 

Short started saying something but Tall slammed a hand over his mouth. “We’re not telling you.” Tall said. “It would be a breach of privacy.”

 

“Tut tut tut, gentlemen. I told you mine. I’m a bandit. It means I trust you guys. Come on. Would I ever give them away?” Dalyn spread his arms. “Of course not. Come on guys.”

 

“You’re a bandit.”

 

“Fine. So, what’s your proposal?”

 

“You steal the Declaration of Independence then tell us about all the traps guarding it.”

 

“And then we pay you.” Tall added, realizing that that was Dalyn’s top priority. He was correct. Dalyn didn’t give a shit about the job, he just wanted the money.

 

“Where is the Declaration of Independence?”

 

“New York City, of course!”

 

“Gentlemen, I’m no idiot. I know you only need to know the traps and how to get past them. It would be so much easier if I stole what you needed. After all, you need a monster to get past holy water. So where are we going?”

 

“A town called Grand Sumva.”

 

“You are paying for train fees.”

 

“No need. We have a car.”

* * *

“Son!” King George said. No, not said. Demanded, as if he was saying Diet Coke so one would appear in his hand.

“Yes, Father.” Logan said.

“I’ve seen you hanging around that guard, Remy, a lot. Has he told you what is in the cave?”

“No, Father. I don’t think he knows himself, Father.”

“Good.” King George said gruffly before walking off. Logan sighed. He wanted to know what was in the cave, but he could never get past the holy water. As is typical with holy water, only beings of pure purity or beings of pure evil could get past holy water. That meant Logan couldn’t find out. Logan hated not knowing. The way he had been raised was simple: being smart is knowing things. Not knowing things meant you were stupid.

Logan got up. It was time for a press conference about revisions to the town he wasn’t allowed to miss.

* * *

“Virgil.”

“Yes, Father.”

“You are eighteen now. That means you must get married.”

“But, Father!”

“Grammar, Virgil.”

“Father, I don’t wish to get married.” Virgil amended.

“You must. And as you don’t have a girlfriend, I have staged a ball. At this ball you must choose a wife. No objections. You will fall in love with them eventually.”

Virgil forced a smile. “Of course, Father.”

“Now, go.” Virgil walked out and grabbed his phone, opening the contact: “Text How Many Hundreds Of Dollars You Want To Go To Charity To This Number”. The number had been switched with Roman’s and he texted Roman the number of their meeting spot.

Virgil: 23

Virgil: 330

* * *

Roman received the text from Virgil. Meeting spot number 23, at 3:30. Right now. Roman darted off to the bandstand, where Virgil was waiting, a cloak covering his wings and bright purple hair.

“Hello dearest.” Roman hugged Virgil.

“Hey, Ro. Do you have an objection to running away with me?”

“When?”

“Right now?”

“I’ll have to pack, but okay.”

“I love you, babe.”

“Love you too!” they shared a quick kiss before walking over to Roman’s house.

* * *

Wow, that was close. Patton had nearly been captured by the police. Jersey City was a hardcore place. Being nice wasn’t allowed. But Patton would change that.

The Hearts were a gang that went around being nice to people. It was dangerous, but it was worth it to make people happy for a second.

Patton’s curly hair was contained in a bandana, and his mouth and nose was covered. He was painting over a swastika graffitied on the side of the building. The swastika being there was illegal, but it would take a while for the police to get to it, so Patton was doing the job.

How could anyone hate Jewish people? He was jewish! Patton decided it was just idiots that thought they were god and everyone had to be like them. They would probably hate Patton. Good.

Sirens. Patton darted off. Sad he couldn’t leave a heart there as per usual. Sad, but true.

Maybe he should move out of Jersey City. Maybe to where his cousin Remy Ahmed moved. Grand Sumva, here comes Patton Watson.

* * *

These all started at the same moment in time. And soon these people will all coexist in one town.

The chances of them existing were small, but they existed. The chances of some of them meeting were small. The chances of them all meeting were infinitesimal.

Luckily Logan doesn’t always use that word correctly. Maybe that’s what screwed up fate. Maybe that’s why they will all end up in Great Sumva.

Or maybe they just have very very good luck.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	3. 7 Seats to a Motorcycle - The Unlucky Number. The Lucky Number is 13. For a Long Time People Have Pondered Why Motorcycles Don't Have 13 Seats. The Answer is Insurance Money.

Virgil and Roman were in Jersey City. They hadn’t meant to stop there. In fact it was on their list of “Do Not Stop Here Under Any Circumstance, I Swear to God, if There Is a God and She is Not Just Something Made by Our Minds to Believe We Are Not Always Responsible For Our Actions, Which She Probably Is”.

 

It turns out favor was on their side, however, for stopping in Jersey City. For in Jersey City was a man they had to meet. This man, we already know, but Virgil and Roman did not. They did not know they had to meet him.

 

Of course, this man was Patton Watson, and his best friend, Emile Picani, who were planning to go to Great Sumva. And seeing how Virgil and Roman weren’t going any place in particular, their motorcycle and sidecar were a perfect ride for Patton and Emile.

 

As you know, motorcycles fit two people, and sidecars five. I am only relaying this information to you because our brains tend to forget small details like this, and it may come up later.

 

Virgil and Roman met Patton in a cafe. Virgil had traded his cloak for a hoodie, because hoodies are less suspicious than cloaks. They had been served by a nice barista. He had only sworn at them eight times!

 

As they sat with their drinks, a man sat across from them. He was beaming. He wore round glasses. A small heart was tattooed on his collarbone: the gang sign of the Hearts. “You’re from out of town.” Patton said, cheerfully.

 

“Yeah…” Roman said, cautiously, because even if the Hearts were nice, this  _ was _ a gang member.

 

“My friend and I, we want to leave town. Can you give us a ride?”

 

“Who’s your friend?” Virgil leaned over the table.

 

“Emile Picani.”

 

“Is he also in your gang?”

 

“His wheelchair doesn’t allow for that.”

 

“And you? Who are you?”

 

“I’m Patton Watson.” Patton glanced around, nervously, and lowered his voice. “And Emile and I really need a ride to Grand Sumva. Can you get us there?”

 

Virgil glanced at Roman and they had a silent conversation. Then Virgil spoke. “Yeah. We’re not really going anywhere anyway. Can a wheelchair fit in a sidecar?”

 

“Yes, we’ve checked before.” Patton’s voice was still hushed. “Meet us at the abandoned train tracks at midnight.” They nodded. Patton smiled and got up, walking away.

* * *

It was midnight. Patton stood at the abandoned train tracks. Emile sat, as he always had too. The motorcycle pulled up.

 

“Okay, get in.” Virgil said. He was sitting behind Roman, who was driving.

 

Patton carefully rolled Emile into the sidecar, where he fit perfectly. Then Patton climbed in, closing the ramp behind him.

 

“You ready?” Roman asked.

 

“Yes.” Patton and Emile chorused. Roman grinned and gunned the ignition, speeding off.

* * *

A motorcycle holding two people, with two more in the side car was cruising next to a black sedan. Inside the black sedan was a thief, or a bandit, as he preferred. We know this bandit, just as we know the people on the motorcycle. He was Dalyn Perez, and he was tossing a pocket watch in the air he stole from Short, who hadn’t noticed yet. He was also bored out of his mind.

“Hey, Short!” No one looked at him. “Short one! Dude! Person who’s watch is engraved with ‘Fuck you, love dad’.” Short looked up. “Think fast.” Dalyn tossed him the watch.

“Hey! How’d you get this?”

“Button on your waistcoat pocket is undone, I just slipped my hand in. Make it harder, dude. Don’t you work for some secret government agency anyway?”

Short just scowled at him and put the watch away. Well. Time for more boredom. Dalyn looked out the window as a motorcycle pulled away. Nothing interesting in that. They passed farmland. Then more farmland. Then more farmland. Where were they, Iowa? Probably. Dalyn absentmindedly traced the scales on his face. He had done a job in Iowa with Remus. They had stolen jewels from an old woman. A year, no two years, before Remus had turned out to be a backstabbing, lying little… calm, Dalyn. Breath. Calm. Remus is gone. He’s not around to hurt you. He’s not going to break your heart again.

Dalyn focused his attention on Tall. He was looking at Short with hungry eyes. Oh god. They had better not… you know… in the car’s bathroom. But it would be better than making out here.

“Fellas?” They looked up at him. “If y’all are going to do anything, I’d like you to do it in the bathroom.”

“And leave a thief here alone? Not a chance.”

“Bandit, gentlemen. And I know you have a lady up front. She can watch me. Oh, don’t be concerned with me flirting with her.” he dismissed, seeing their faces. “I’m as straight as a line. Drawn by someone going through withdrawal. She’ll be fine.”

The men glanced at each other before nodding. One (Short) rapped on the door to the front. “Come watch the thief!” he ordered.

“Bandit!” Dalyn corrected as the lady entered the room and Short and Tall walked into the bathroom.

“Don’t make too much noise.” The woman said. “Hello. Dalyn, was it? I’m Anthea.”

“That’s not your real name. You got that from Sherlock.”

She raised her eyebrow. “You watch Sherlock? I’m impressed where does a theif-” Dalyn coughed “Sorry, bandit, watch TV?”

“There’s a thing called libraries, lady.”

“Of course. And you read?”

“Yes. I do.”

They sat in silence, except for a few moans from the bathroom. Dalyn studied “Anthea”. She was a cis female, pan or bi, going by the fact that she was wearing a braclet from a bar that said “I’m looking for boys or girls or anything in between”. She had dark skin, and loose natural hair in an afro. Her nails were pink. Her pink skirt wasn’t a skirt, but was connected to a dress, probably for a  date after work. Judging from the necklace of two Aphrodite’s mirrors strung together, a date with a girl.

Neither Dalyn or “Anthea” knew she was never getting to that date.   
  
  



	4. Babe, Sweetie, Honey, Darling, Boo, Sugar

“Ok. You have to be kidding me.” Roman said as they entered their motel room. “I knew it was going to be crappy, but seriously?”

 

“Holy shit.” Virgil paraphrased.

 

There was only one bed.

 

“Aw, kiddos, we can share! Also, language, Virge!” Virgil glanced at Patton. When had he started the nicknames?

 

“Four people to one bed?” Emile, of all people, said skeptically. “I’ll sleep on the couch.”

 

“Emile.” Patton pouted.

 

“My legs don’t work. I won’t roll off.”

 

“Fine.” Emile smiled at his best friend and rolled over to the couch.

 

Virgil flopped on the bed. “It’s going to be a tight fit.”

 

“You would sleep practically on top of me anyway, Para-morose.” Roman said, laying down next to Virgil. “It’ll be fine, sweetie.”

 

“I guess.” Virgil pressed a small kiss to Roman’s cheek before standing up and pulling off his hoodie and shirt. He spread his dark feathered wings with a sigh.

 

“You’re a prince?” Patton said, trying not to look at Virgil’s bare chest.

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Wait.” Emile said. “Prince Virgil? Of the U.S.? That Prince?”

 

“Um… yeah.”

 

“I’m a fan.”

 

“Cool. I guess.”

 

The conversation died down as Patton changed into pyjamas and joined Virgil and Roman. Emile lay on the couch. They all drifted to sleep.

* * *

The last thing King George wanted was strangers to enter Grand Sumva and start asking about the caves. There were five of these strangers. A driver that never talked, a short man, a tall man, a woman, and a male Logan’s age. And what King George did when bad things happened was throw those bad things in jail. There was a rotten pineapple sitting in one of the cells.

 

The woman sat in a jail cell, alone, in the women’s section of the jail. Ugh. She would never go on that date.

 

“Sup.” the woman startled and looked at the person who was looking at them from the other cell. Their arms dangled through the bars.

 

“Hello.”

 

“I’m Nico. What’s your name?”

 

“I’m Anthea.”

 

“Uh, no you aren’t. Real names here.” Nico rolled their eyes.

 

“Angelica. It’s Angelica.” Angelica sighed.

 

“Angelic.” Nico winked “What you in for?”

 

“Being new in town. You?”

 

“I don’t know, man. They said I’m the key to something. I zoned out. They’re moving me to a more secure location tomorrow. I’m not female by the way.”

 

“What are you?”

 

“Genderfluid. My gender changes. I’m nonbinary right now.” Nico ruffled their short red hair unknowingly. Angelica found herself a  _ bit _ distracted. “What are you, Angelica?”

 

“I’m just a girl. Cis.”

 

“Cool. So, Angelica, if you ever get out, and if I ever get out, which is a small chance, you want to get dinner?”

 

“You’re seriously flirting with a girl you just met?”

 

“You like girls, and why not? Also that wasn’t flirting. I straight up asked you out. Well, not straight up. Never straight. What say you, hun?”

 

“If you ever get out, and if I ever get out, you can take me out to dinner. Doesn’t sound that likely though.”

 

“Cool. What food do you like?”

 

“Edible food.”

* * *

“I’m bored.” Dalyn said.

“Well, what do you want us to do about it!” Short snapped.

“Listen, I’m just stating a fact. No need to get hostile, my dude.” Dalyn raised his hands defensively.

The sound of feet filled the hallway, and a boy stood in front of the cell. They all looked up at him.

“Damn, boy, you don’t belong down here.” Dalyn whistled.

“I am Prince Logan Carter, son of King George Carter. I have been sent here by my father to interrogate you.”

“Ok, cutie. Also nice circlet.” Dalyn flashed the silver crown he had nabbed off Logan’s head.

“Don’t call me… and how did you get that.”

“Magicians never reveal their secrets, handsome.”

“But you’re not a magician, you’re a thief.”

“Darling, it was a joke.”

“Please stop.”

“The pet names or the stealing, boo?” Dalyn dangled Logan’s bracelet.

“Both.”

“Honey, you have to choose. Pet names or stealing?”

“The stealing, then.”

“Of course, sugar.”

Logan sighed. This was going to take a while. Dalyn grinned. This was going to be fun.

“Babe, did it hurt when you fell?”

“What?”

“When you fell from heaven?”

“Are you calling me satan?”

“When you fell from the vending machine then?”

“What?”

“Cause, sweetheart, you a snack.”

“Please stop.”

* * *

“Ahmed!”

“What is it, sir?” Remy addressed his commander.

“There are more interlopers in town.”

“Fuck!” Remy said quietly, before raising his voice so Commander Wilson could hear it. “I’ll be on it right away, sir.”

* * *

“We’re here.” Roman said, stepping off the motorcycle and waving his hand grandly.

“We shouldn’t have gotten to Grand Sumva so fast.” Emile said, proving himself to be much more of a skeptic than anyone had realized. For someone who liked Disney, he was sure pessimistic.

“Time is shit, Emile.” Virgil responded. “Huge piles of shit. Time is completely fake and nothing you do can change that.”

“Language.”

Suddenly a guard was running toward them. “Hey, what are you doing here! Patton?” They switched tone so fast Virgil almost got whiplash.

“Remy!”

They hugged. Emile was thinking one thing. Holy shit, Remy Ahmed is hot.

“Gurls, I have to save you from jail. Coming here was a big mistake. Come on.” Remy gestured for them to follow him. “Leave the bike, babe.” Roman pouted but did as Remy asked.   
  
  
  
  
  


 


	5. Maybe I'm Moving Too Fast, But At Least This Isn't a Fucking Rom Com. Imagine The Horror of This as a Rom Com

Logan rubbed his temples. That prisoner had been infuriating. And also kinda hot??? Logan didn’t think he would say that about someone who used pet names every sentence, but his best friend did call everyone “babe” or “hun” or “gurl”. Maybe Logan was just used to it. Yes, that was it. He was used to it and found it endearing. He definitely didn’t have a crush on the cute prisoner. Definitely.

 

He flopped back onto his bed. Now he just had to convince himself that. But his thoughts kept drifting to his heterochromatic eyes. That brown one, and the green one with the slit pupil. He wondered if the slit pupil grew round when happy or… no, bad Logan. You have a test coming up. Think about that. But his mind refused to.

 

Logan buried his face in his pillow and screamed. His brain was a little bitch. He randomly grabbed around for something to distract him. He grabbed his headphones and phone. He slid them on and clicked on a random album.

 

“ _ One look from you _

_ And I'm on that faded love _

_ Out of my body _

_ And flying above _ .”

 

No no no no  _ no _ . He clicked randomly again.

 

_ “I don't know where you're going _

_ But do you got room for one more troubled soul? _

_ I don't know where I'm going _

_ But I don't think I'm coming home and I said _

_ I'll check in tomorrow if I don't wake up dead _

_ This is the road to ruin _

_ And we're starting at the end _ .”

 

NO!

 

“ _ Do you do, do you remember  _

_ When we drove, we drove, drove through the night _

_ And we danced, we danced _

_ To Rancid, and we danced, we danced _

_ And I confessed, confessed to you  _

_ Riding shotgun underneath the purple skies _

_ And we danced, we danced _

_ With windows down, and we danced, we danced _ .”

 

Logan made a sound akin to a hiss. He switched bands.

 

“ _ When the world gets too heavy _

_ Put it on my back _

_ I'll be your levy _

_ You are taking me apart _

_ Like bad glue _

_ On a get well card _ .”

 

Click.

 

“ _ I'm a disappearing act done poorly _

_ But if I ever get it right, you'll miss me sorely _

_ I look like the cat that just ate the canary _

_ Coughing up feathers _

_ There's a "get out of jail" card if I can think of something clever _ .”

 

No.

 

“ _ If all our life is but a dream _

_ Fantastic posing greed _

_ Then we should feed our jewelry to the sea _

_ For diamonds do appear to be _

_ Just like broken glass to me _ .”

 

Fuck. All the songs with lyrics were romantic, all without weren’t distracting enough. He screamed into his pillow again. If there was a God, what the hell was She playing at?

* * *

“Welcome to the cave, babes.” Remy said. “You can stay here. There’s food in those rotting boxes. I know, hard to believe.”

“Be safe Rem!”

“I have a story. ‘I’m sorry sir, they left town the minute they saw me.’ Commander Wilson is dumb enough. She doesn’t really care as long as she gets paid.” Remy rolled his eyes, not that it was noticeable under the sunglasses. “Commander Wilson is annoying. I get she’s doing her job, but still. She doesn’t have to be so strict. I wonder if her datemates like it and she’s practicing.” Remy dodged the can of beans Virgil threw at him. “Ok, chill. I’m just saying. Her datemate Auberi seems the type. Micah not so much.” He dodged another can. “Ok, fine! I’ll shut up.”

“How do you know about these caves, Remy?”

“Sometimes, when I meet a nice boy, I take them down here and-”

“Remy!” Patton cut him off. “We both know you’re ace. Nice try.”

“Fine. I live down here. I know, it’s sparsely decorated, but the government checks in on you if you make any suspicious purchases like furniture. So. Welcome to my abode.” He gestured at the whole rocky cave. “It’s great. Now I have to get back to work, so… bye.” He winked at Emile. “Bye, hun. Nice meeting you.”

“Remy, stop flirting with my friend!” Patton demanded as Emile turned bright red.

“Aw, Pat, you’re no fun. He doesn’t mind, do you, sweetheart?” Remy looked at Emile, who was now red as a radish and shaking his head. “He doesn’t mind.” Remy pressed a quick kiss to Emile’s cheek and ran off. Emile raised his hand to his cheek, dumbfounded.

“Rem! Too fast!” Patton yelled after his cousin, but Remy was already gone. Emile grinned.

* * *

Dalyn lay with his feet on the wall. He tossed a handmade ball in the air. Up then down. Up. Down. Up. Down. Boring, really. Short and Tall were making out, so Dalyn ignored them. This was a public place, however. Maybe he should stop them. “Please stop.”

The men ignored him.

“Gentlemen, stop making out. I have no interest in seeing that.” They didn’t stop. Dalyn stopped asking.

The driver sat, as silent and emotionless as before.

Dalyn was bored. He tried adding variety in with the ball throwing. Up, clap, down. Up, clap clap, down. Up, clap clap clap, down. Up, clap clap clap clap, down. Up, clap clap clap clap clap, down. Up, clap clap clap clap clap oops. He watched the ball roll out of the cell. Oof.

The two men kept making out. “Stop.” They didn’t. “Please.” no answer, no let up in their PDA. “Ugh.”  he stared at the wall. There was a spot. He wondered why there was a spot. It looked like blood. He didn’t want to find out if it was blood. His mind drifted away.

He missed Remus. Remus always thought of fun things to do in cells. Mainly makeout. But he also hated Remus. How dare Remus leave him. They were the best bandits, and then Dalyn woke up with a knife in his back and a note from Remus detailing that he was going home. He had gone to jail for a month after the hospital visit.

If Dalyn ever saw Remus Duke again Remus was dead. Remus had better be ready.

Dalyn punched the cell floor. It was stone, and it hurt. Holy fuck. At least the pain could distract him for a few minutes.   
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Logan likes emo music FIGHT ME


	6. Gender is Stupid. Life is Stupid. Parents are Stupid. Dresses are Stupid. Everything is Stupid.

“Put this dress on.”

 

“No.”

 

“Dress. On. Now.”

 

“No! No dresses!”

 

“Now, Miss.”

 

“I’m not a miss and I’m not wearing a fucking dress. No means no, you bastards.”

 

“Cleveland, hold her down and get her in the goddamn dress.”

 

“Rot in hell.” Spit hit the person holding the dress in the face.

 

Commander Wilson wiped the spit off her face. “I’m sure I will, Miss Spencer.”

* * *

Virgil banged his head to the music playing over his headphones. He was bored. Roman was taking a bath in the water pools, and Emile was casually fangirling over Remy to Patton. He was just sitting here on this wooden crate with nothing to do.

 

Maybe he could draw. He rifled through the very small bag he had packed. Yes, he had brought his sketchbook. No, he hadn’t brought a pencil. He set the sketchbook down and flopped his head down into his hands with a sigh.

 

“Babe, you okay?” Virgil looked up at Roman, who was dripping wet and standing over him. Damn, that was hot. Even with the binder and towel. Roman was a god to Virgil. A god that loved him! Virgil tried to get on a sane train of thought as he answered.

 

“Yeah. Just bored.”

 

“Did you forget your fidget cube?”

 

“No, but it doesn’t always help, love.”

 

“Vee. You don’t want a panic attack.” Roman reached into Virgil’s stuff and pulled it out. “Try to distract yourself. I’m going to go get dressed.”

 

“Kay, Ro.”

 

“Kiss?”

 

“Of course.” Roman bent down and pecked Virgil on the lips.

 

“Love you, _príncipe oscuro_.”

 

“You didn’t even know I was a prince at first, shut up with the prince nicknames.”

 

“Do you love me too, Vee?”

 

“Of course, I love you too, _príncipe falso_ , are you an idiot?”

 

“I hate you.”

 

“No you don’t.”

 

“No I don’t. I love you more than the earth itself” he said, even though that was impossible, because without the earth Virgil wouldn’t exist. But Roman kissed Virgil again, this time with tongue, and that more than made up for his slip in logic.

* * *

Logan played the last note on his violin with perfection.

 

“Brava, darling.” His mother, Queen Livia said, not quite mastering the lie that she had been listening the whole time and not thinking about parties or whatever went on in that distant head of hers.

 

“Logan, son.” King George said. “Don’t you think it’s time to learn a more masculine instrument, like the tuba?”

 

“George, darling, Logan is wonderful. I’m sure the violin is masculine enough.”

 

“Fine.” King George grumbled, storming off to find a servant to torment.

 

“Thank you, mother.”

 

“What? Oh yes, wonderful, Logan. Why don’t you run along now. Lady Margerie is coming for tea.”

 

“Of course mother.” Logan bowed his head and walked out of the parlor to find the cook.

 

“Lolo!” Harriet cried as Logan stepped into the kitchen.

 

“Hello, Harriet.”

 

“Lolo, ya don’ need ta be as formal aroun’ me. Can ya help me make this pie? All ya need ta do is chop those apples right and pretty.”

 

“Of course-” Harriet fixed him with a look “yes-” they raised their eyebrows “Yeah, I can do that, Harriet.”

 

“Lolo, dear, you don’t need ta call me Harriet. Call me Harri. Or Ren. I see what ya real mum does ta take care of ya, and it ain’t all that much.”

 

“Harri?”

 

“Yes, child, are ya deaf?” Harriet handed him a knife. “Now chop those apples up, unless ya didn’t hear that too?”

 

“I heard that. Um, Ren?”

 

Harriet looked up in surprise and beamed. “There ya go, Lolo. Ya need a real parent, not some doll for the media to eat up and some man trying harder to brainwash people than have real emotions.”

 

Logan smiled at her, a real smile. “Thank you, Harriet. I mean, thanks, Ren.”

  
“Now, how are those violin lessons going? Marie tells me you’re getting good.” Harriet grinned at Logan as he cut the apples. Those bastards better not hurt their son. Even if they weren’t related by blood. They had several knives, after all.

* * *

Well, this cave would certainly be an improvement over the cell, if it wasn’t for the dress. The very very _very_ dysphoric dress. He tried taking it off. It stayed on. He tried shifting into a male form, what he did whenever his gender changed. He stayed in the same horrible female body he had been born into with the long hair and breasts and vagina. He tried to shift his nails short so he wouldn’t scratch at his skin. Nothing. Long, so he could scratch at his arms and draw blood. Still nothing.

 

“Don’t bother trying to change down there, Miss!” A soldier called down. “There are only two things you can change into, yourself, and one animal. You get a phone call every friday. The dress is enchanted, it’ll stay clean, but you can’t take it off. And I wouldn’t touch the water if I were you. It’s holy.”

 

He snarled at the guard, despite not knowing where they were. _Now let’s see what this animal is_ he thought. He tried shifting through his normal forms. Fox, cat, dog, snake, crow, owl. No. Unicorn, lion, tiger, monkey, black jaguar. No. Eagle, hawk, falcon, honey badger, horse. No. His breathing became faster. What was it? What, what, what? He dropped into a little ball, crying. No no no no no. _One more. Try one more._ He urged himself. _One more before you have a panic attack_. He concentrated.

 

His skin grew scaly. His nails grew dark and became claws. Leathery wings sprouted from his back. He grew, and his teeth became fangs. He roared. Much better. Then he looked down. Fuck. He still had a vagina.  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait, I was having a depressive period, and had to force myself to move or eat.
> 
> Have a great day, fuckers.


	7. Ok, I Know It Doesn't Make Sense, But He's Made of Light and Flesh and Bone, Ok?

She was female now. She shifted back into a human, rolling her shoulders back with a groan. Much better. A sharp ringing sound cut through the air, making her clamp her hands over her ears before spotting the source: a telephone. She picked it up. Her friend answered. She sighed in relief.

 

“Get me out of here!” she begged into the phone.

 

“I can’t.”

 

“What?!”

 

“I’m not allowed to. What are your pronouns today?”

 

She sighed “She/her.”

 

“Okay. So my life has been crazy…” She listened as her friend rambled on, wishing she had something to add. But there isn’t much to do as a dragon. There isn’t much to do when you’re trapped in a cave.

* * *

It wasn’t like Patton got bored easily. Talking could fill hours of his time. But he had been talking for hours with Emile, and now he was bored. He glanced around the sparse cave. Maybe he could just explore? It wasn’t like he could talk to Roman and Virgil, they were sucking face in a corner.

He poked around for a bit, until he came across a bit of water that didn’t seem connected to the other water around them. He made to poke at it.

“Stop!” Remy yelled, entering the cave. Virgil and Roman broke apart, and Patton pulled his finger back. Emile just looked at Remy with confusion. Remy walked over to Patton, ignoring the lovebirds, who promptly started kissing again. “That’s holy water!”

Patton recoiled, moving backwards from the innocent seeming water. “Oh Jesus.”

“Yeah. I don’t want you to shrivel up and die.” Remy dangled a leaf over the holy water and dropped it in. The leaf disintegrated. “And no offense, I don’t think you’re a being of pure light. Or a monster.”

“No, I’m not.” They laughed, joylessly. Remy faked a smile and walked over to Virgil and Roman, tapping them both on their heads, hard.

“No sexual intercourse in my good christian minecraft server.” they laughed, more at the meme than the words. More at the fact it was supposed to be funny than at the meme.

None of them were actually happy. All of them could sense an unrest in the air, and they knew they had something to do with the unrest.

Remy walked over to Emile. They spoke, hushed, although they didn’t need to be hushed.

The cave was quiet. It was not a good christian minecraft server.

* * *

“Ren, I like someone.” Logan said. Harriet looked up in surprise.

“Attaboy, Lolo! Who’s the lucky girl?”

“It’s not a girl, Ren.”

“Lucky boy, then. Hand me that knife will ya?”

Logan handed them the knife. “A prisoner of the law that flirted with me as I interviewed him.”

Harriet let out a long whistle as they chopped a potato. “Wow, Lolo. Seems like ya got some trouble there.”

Logan buried his face in his hands. “I know! I’m not supposed to love a boy, let alone an interloper.”

“Nah, I’m talkin’ about wooing the lucky soul. Wash your hands after they’re out of ya hair, dear. Hair ain’t exactly sanitary.”

“What? You’re not complaining?”

“Child, I’m not even on the gender binary and ya think I would complain about ya likin’ a boy? Ya dumb?”

“True.” Logan grinned at Harriet as he washed his hands. “Do you think Remy will mind?”

“The captain of the guard is dating two genderqueer people, and he doesn’t seem to mind. Rem’ll be fine, Lolo. Except for maybe the criminal part.” Harriet tossed a potato at him. “Look disappointed in it as you chop it up, it gets the most flavor.”

Logan nodded and put on his best disappointed face.

* * *

Dalyn was whistling a tune he had made up. It even had lyrics in his head ( _ Remus Duke fucking sucks, fucking sucks, fucking sucks. Remus Duke fucking sucks, no matter how much he denies it. Remus Duke should rot in hell, rot in hell, rot in hell. Remus Duke rot in hell, no matter how much he denies it _ is the gist of it. It sounds slightly scottish and a bit like a nursery rhyme). Then he heard boot coming down the hall, precise steps. He stopped whistling and said “Princey.”

Logan leered at Dalyn. “Thief.”

“Bandit!” Dalyn corrected.

Logan rolled his eyes. “Thief, I would like to congratulate you. You are one of the only people to ever successfully infuriate me to the point I might stab them. For this you have earned a hand shake.”

“Only if you reach into the cell, angel.”

“I was planning to, um…?”

“Dalyn.”

“I was planning to, Dalyn.”

“Aww, doll, that’s like base two in cell relationships.”

“Thank you for that disturbing imagery.”

“No probs, honey.”

“You already used that one.”

“You’re keeping track? How sweet!”

Logan sighed and stuck his hand into the cell though the bars. Dalyn grinned and grabbed the hand. Logan pulled him forward, against the bars of the cell. “Wait till they’re asleep.” Dalyn frowned, confused. Logan pulled away. “Bye, Dalyn.”

“Bye, babe! Dream of me!” Dalyn looked at his fist and opened it. Inside was a gold key. The key to the cell. Dalyn grinned. Well well well. Maybe Princey boy was worth his time.

* * *

“Patton’s kinda cute.” Roman said to Virgil, combing his hands through Virgil’s hair. Usually, this is not something you say to your boyfriend, especially a boyfriend who has anxiety disorders. However, both Virgil and Roman were polyamorous, so this was allowed.

“Mm, yeah.” Virgil said, watching Patton, who was currently trying to make something edible out of the stale food. He would probably fail, but it could become a bit more palatable.

Patton tripped over a rock, falling into the small pool of holy water. Everyone made a horrified noise, in varying stages of screams or gasps or swears.

Light filled the cave, brighter than any of them had ever seen.

* * *

She covered her eyes as light filled every part of the holy water, streaming off it, as if an angel had touched it. She screamed at the light. She tried to turn into a blind animal. It didn’t work. She screamed and screamed. No one came. She didn’t expect them to.   
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what about Far From Home, huh?


	8. Of course, angels do not exist. It is illegal to consider their existence, or even to give them a dollar when they forget bus money and start hovering around the Ralphs asking for change.

She sat in her cave, humming a song. She didn’t remember what song it was, if it was Fall Out Boy or Panic! at the Disco or My Chemical Romance. She didn’t remember a lot sitting in the cave.

 

Her eyes hurt from the light that had come a few minutes ago. She breathed calmly as she hummed. She didn’t want to panic, no matter what the light was.

 

The song ended. She searched her head for another. It obliged with a musical tune. She sang quietly “Pop. Six. Squish. Uh-uh. Cicero. Lipshitz.” It wasn’t exactly a one person song, but she was past caring. She was stuck in a cave, and she couldn’t distinguish most of the songs bouncing in her head. Was that a singer she knew or a song she just liked? She didn’t know. She didn’t even know out of the cave most of the time.

 

“He had it coming, he had coming.” She belted, fully aware it was terrible for her voice. It wasn’t like she had a good voice anyway.

* * *

“Patton!” Emile yelled.

“Holy fuck!” Virgil yelled.

“No!” Roman yelled.

“Shit!” Remy yelled.

They all moved to the puddle as quickly as they could, but Patton was surprisingly not a puddle of goo. He got up perfectly fine. “Why are you all staring at me?”

Well, just before it had been because he was supposed to be dead. But now it was because he was glowing and had wings. He also had several more eyes than before.

“Holy shit.” Remy and Virgil chorused.

“What?”

“Look at yourself.” Emile said.

Patton did, as best he could. He examined his arms and looked back up. “What?”

“You are glowing.”

Patton shrieked. “I am?!”

“You can’t?!” Remy yelled, gesturing at Patton. “You’re an angel!”

“Thanks? I guess?”

“No, literally. Extra eyes and all.”

Patton laughed. “What is this, a prank?”

“No!” Remy held up a piece of glass to Patton.

“I look… normal. What?”

Emile buried his head in his hand and mumbled something.

“What?”

“He doesn’t know he’s an angel. He can only see that he’s an angel if he believes he’s one.”

The faint strains of “He had it coming” filled the cave. Roman perked his head up at the musical music, but then turned back to the issue at hand.

A voice sounded from the entry to the cave. “Why is he glowing?” the turned around and Remy bowed as the prince entered the cave.

* * *

Logan was starting to feel bad about letting prisoners out. What if Dalyn didn’t actually find him cute, and was just trying to get out?

He was walking around by the caves. He didn’t know how he got there, but that didn’t concern him. It was normal to forget part of your life. He was probably just needed by his dad’s cabinet or something.

“Hey!” someone called. He didn’t look up. “Hey, Logan!””

“It’s prince Logan!” Logan yelled, looking up to see… Dalyn? “It’s not night.”

“Listen, they were too busy making out to notice. What’s the most secure prison in Grand Sumva?”

“Where you were. Why?”

“Angelica wants to find a cute person she was talking to.” a woman walked up behind Dalyn and waved.

“Their name’s Nico.”

“No idea. Sorry. Anything else, Dalyn?”

“Um, yeah.” Dalyn approached Logan, stopping just in front of him. “Thanks for helping me to get out.” he leaned forward and pressed his lips to Logan’s. “I appreciate it, Princey.” he said when he pulled away. Then he walked off, Angelica following.

Logan stood there dumbly. He raised his hand to his lips. Did that just happen?

Then some screams came from a cave entrance by him. He walked in.

* * *

He just did that. He really just did that. He turned to Angelica. “I really just did that!”

“You did. You two would be cute together.”

“No. I’m polyam, and he probably wouldn’t want to date someone polyam.”

“Then fuck him. What are we doing?”

“Looking for the cave I was supposed to break into and see if boats can go over holy water.”

“Answer me honestly. Am I your lab rat?”

“Of course you’re my lab rat.” Dalyn said. “No, Angelica, you aren’t my lab rat. I caught some real rats.” He held up his bag.

“I don’t feel like that’s right.”

“It’s so you and Logan don’t die, Gel, deal with it.”

“I don’t like that nickname.”

“Ange? Lica? Gigi?”

“Ann.”

“Kay, Ann.”

They stopped at the cave. “Time to get past the guards.”

“You didn’t tell me there would be guards, I feel betrayed.”

“Don’t worry I have a plan. Do you mind playing a criminal?”

* * *

“Prince Logan.” Remy said to the man.

“Up. Why is he glowing, please explain.”

“He touched holy water and apparently he’s an angel.” Virgil summed up. “But he can’t tell he is until he truly believes, and that’s not happening right now.”

“That’s weird.”

“Ya think?”

“Um, Prince Logan, excuse my impudence but why are you bright red?”

Logan’s face became an even brighter shade of red. “Um… no reason.”

Roman scoffed. “Who kissed you?”

“Did you finally find a finacée? Um, Prince Logan.”

“I don’t like girls, and you can just call me Logan.”

“Of course, Pri- Logan. I’m Remy, and these are Patton, Virgil, Roman, and Emile. Emile’s my boyfriend.”

Patton turned to Remy “Since when?! You just met?!”

“Who cares, cuz? You’re a literal angel, and you care about my love life. Gurl, we have bigger fish to fry.”

“I care.”

“Gurl. You are glowing. Literally. Leave my love life alone. It’s not like we’re going to have sex.”

“Fine.” Patton sighed and walked over to Roman and Virgil. “When did this happen?” He whispered as Remy fangirled over Logan.

“I have no clue. The glowing is cool, by the way.” Roman whispered back.

“Ok, thanks?”

“The eyes are unsettling.”

“Ruin it all, Roman, why don’t you.” Virgil snarked. “Don’t worry, I'm a monsterfucker.”

“What?”

“What?”

“What?”

“Do you like me, Virgil?”

Virgil pulled his hood up and blushed. “Um, maybe?”

“But you’re dating Roman.”

“It’s allowed.”

“Wait, it doesn’t make me weird?”

Roman and Virgil glanced at each other in hope. “No.”

Patton grinned. “That’s amazing. So I can do this?” He pressed a kiss to each of their lips.

“Absolutely.” Roman said, pulling Patton in for another, more passionate, kiss.

The others all turned turned around to look at them. Neither Remy or Emile were really phased, but Logan’s jaw dropped. “That’s allowed?”

“Um, yeah.”

* * *

“Welcome to the end of eras!” she sang. “Ice has melted back to life! Done my time and served my sentence, dress me up and watch me die. If it feels good, tastes good, it must be mine. Dynasty decapitated, you just might see a ghost night.” Her voice quieted. “And if you don't know, now you know.” Her voice rose again “I’m taking back the crown! I’m all dressed up and naked! I see what’s mine and take it! (finders keepers, losers weepers) Oh yeah! The crown! So close I can taste it, I see what’s mine and take it! (finders keepers losers weepers). Oh yeah!”   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well that was fast.


	9. Fanart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo I drew some fanart for this. Here ya go. Check out my tumblr give-me-the-gay


	10. Polyamoury and Mice, Sadly No Polyamourus Mice, but No Dead Mice Either, No Matter How Hard Dalyn Tries.

She lay in her cave. She wasn’t doing anything, just lying there and thinking, writing in her head. She wondered what the story of her life would be called. Probably  _ A Giant Piece of Shit isn’t Cis _ .

* * *

“Halt.” one of the guards pointed a spear at Dalyn who simply sighed.

 

“Did they not tell you I was coming? I’m Remus Duke, and I was sent to execute this prisoner with holy water.”

 

“We never execute people.”

 

“Ah, but this one is really bad.” Dalyn lowered his voice to a conspiratorial whisper. “Asked after the king’s son.”

 

Commander Wilson just sighed. “King George wants to marry prince Logan off.”

 

“Yes, but she said she would do some stuff…”

 

“What stuff?”

 

“Stuff, commander. That kinda stuff.”

 

“We are not shameful men, Duke.”

 

“She said she would.” Dalyn sighed “I can’t say it. It is too upsetting. I’m sorry, but I am a shameful man.”

 

Angelica gave Commander Wilson a sly grin. “I said I would fuck him till he screamed and tie him up so he was mine and only mine. I said I would make him cry for my love and-”

 

“In, Duke. Now.” She cut Angelica off and pointed at the cave entrance.

 

Once they were farther in, Dalyn laughed. “Well that was stressful.”

 

“How do you feel about the king trying to marry the love of your life off?”

 

Dalyn blushed “he’s not the love of my life.”

 

“Correction: one of the loves of your life.”

 

“Weird.”

 

“So, do you identify with what I said?”

 

“Ann!” Dalyn hit Angelica. Hard.

 

“Well?”

 

“I’m not answering that.”

 

“You totally do!”

* * *

Virgil pressed a kiss to the side of one of Patton’s eyes, the highest one.

“That felt funny.”

“It should, you don’t even know that eye is there. So are we dating now?”

“If Patton wants to.”

“Yeah.” Roman grinned and gave Patton a passionate kiss.

When the broke apart Patton let out a small laugh. “You. are a really good kisser.”

“I know.” Virgil said. “One of the best.”

Roman looked offended, and Patton looked confused “One of the best?”

“Well, the other best is right here.” Virgil said, pointing at Patton with a grin. They laughed.

“Could you not. We are right here,” Remy interjected, “and if I make out with Emile then Logan will be all alone.”

“I can go.” Logan said. “I only came in here for the screaming, and I really have to talk to this guy…”

“Stay a while.” Remy begged.

“Fine.” Logan said, unfazed.

* * *

Dalyn laid the wood on the water and took out a mouse. “It’s adorable!” Angelica complained.

“I know, I’m sorry.” he said, gently setting the mouse on the wood. Nothing happened. “Well that's good.”

“What are you doing, Dalyn?”

“I’m finding out what’s on the other side of that holy water.”

* * *

“Logan, what do your wings look like?”

Logan peeled off his shirt, revealing that he was surprisingly buff, and spread his wings, white and dark blue.

“Ooh, Vee, show yours for comparison.”

“You have wings?”

“Um, yeah.” Virgil brought out his wings.

“Remy?” Remy looked up at his cousin. “I thought you said you were friends with the prince? Were you lying? Cause this seems more like that one rabid fangirl Harry Styles saying he is friends with band members he likes.”

“Ok, gurl you caught us. We pretend not to know each other cause people use that shit for blackmail. It’s really fun.”

“It  _ is _ somewhat fun.”

They all laughed.

* * *

“I thought you said we were finding out what-”

“Was on the other side? Yeah, I’m inviting someone to come with us.”

“Ooh, is it Logan?” Angelica wiggled her eyebrows.

“Yeah. He smells like cinnamon, apples, and shitty cologne.”

“He wears-?”

“It isn’t his.” Dalyn stuck his tongue out.

“You smell with your tongue?” Angelica said, not really surprised. Dalyn nodded, following Logan’s scent into a cave, where he found Logan making out with a literal angel.

Upon spotting him Logan jumped back and yelled “I can explain!”   


* * *

She was so tired, but she couldn’t sleep. She didn’t even know what day it was, or if it was another day at all. She wanted… not to die, but to drift into a coma, where she wouldn’t have to deal with this shit.

She hated this. Why would this happen to her? Of all people. Why was she this key? To whatever she was the key to. A tear dripped from her reptilian eye and hit the ground with a loud  _ plap _ . More tears fell.   
  
  
  



	11. A Monster Hates an Angel but for a Good Reason

“Ok, so. Why were all three of you kissing?” Logan asked.

 

“It’s called polyamory, and it means you can romantically love several people.”

 

“So I’m polyamourus.”

 

“You are? Amazing.”

 

“But, what if I like someone and they aren’t polyamourus?”

 

“You can say polyam.”

 

“Well?”

 

“Then they should accept you.”

 

“But what if he doesn’t?”

 

“Then he’s a fucking dumbass.” Roman said, smiling faintly at the prince.

 

“But I love him.”

 

“Who, L? You have told me about no one, and we’re, like, BFFs, gurl.”

 

Logan turned red. “His name is Dalyn and he may or may not be an escaped prisoner.”

 

“Logan!”

 

“Emile would be a prisoner too if you didn’t help him escape!”

 

“Well, yeah, but you’re the motherfucking prince.”

 

“Ugh, fine. I’m just scared he wouldn’t still love me.”

 

“Well, then that’s too bad, because you, Prince Logan seem like an amazing guy.”

 

“No, I’m not.”

 

“Yes you are!” Patton demanded. “You are amazing!” Patton neared Logan, yelling about how awesome he was until they were very  _ very _ close. “Um…”

 

“Uh.”

 

Neither was quite sure who closed the gap, just that neither minded.

 

* * *

 

“You know what, no I can’t.” Logan said, having no idea how to explain any of that to Dalyn.

 

Dalyn scowled. “You are a fucking bastard. I get we weren’t technically dating but still. I shouldn’t have taken that as you liking me.” Dalyn turned around, about to storm off.

 

“Dalyn wait!”

 

“What!”

 

“I… do.”

 

“You what, Prince Logan?”

 

“I do like you. That way.”

 

“Good one, prince. Tell that to your angel boyfriend.”

 

“Dalyn, believe me!”

 

“You know what, princey, I would have been perfectly fine if you asked me! I wouldn’t mind! I’m polyam! I get we weren’t even dating but I liked you, Logan! You seemed nice, and kind, and you helped me get out, and I came here to find you so you could help me, but you’re just a dick.”

 

“Dalyn, please.” Logan pleaded, but Dalyn just scowled.

 

“Fuck off.”

 

“Dalyn!”

 

He spun around and scowled at the person who had just called his name. “Who are you?”

 

“I am Prince Virgil, and Patton isn’t Logan’s boyfriend. He’s mine. And Roman’s.” Virgil pointed his head at Roman and Roman elbowed him.

 

“Roman? More like Remus?”

 

“You know my brother?!”

 

“He has a brother?!”

 

“How do you know Remus?”

 

“He worked with me. And now I’m leaving. Goodbye, Prince Logan.” Dalyn spit at Logan before turning and storming out of the cave.

 

Angelica surveyed the cave and took in Logan’s heartbroken face. “I’m sorry.” she mouthed before following Dalyn out.

 

A tear fell from Logan’s eye, hitting the ground with a loud PLOP.

* * *

 

The minute he was out of the cave Dalyn fell to the ground and started crying, loud sobs wracking his body.

 

“You okay?” Angelica asked her friend.

 

“No.”

 

“He actually looked sad.”

 

“I don’t give a shit if he can act. He’s a prince, of course he can act.”

 

“Ok.” Angelica sat down next to him, saying nothing, but wrapping an arm around Dalyn.

 

“Ann, it happened again.”

 

“What happened again?”

 

“I trusted someone and they broke my heart.”

 

“Who was the other?”

 

“Remus Duke.”

 

“Talk about him. Rant.”

 

“We worked together. We dated, well, more friends with benefits, but those benefits including kissing. Then I wake up with a knife in my back, literally, and a note from him.  _ I’m leaving forever, Jessica. Forever. Unicorn porn _ .”

 

“Unicorn porn?”

 

“He liked to put disturbing thoughts in people’s heads.”

 

“Ah. I could find and kill him.”

 

“Could you really?”

 

“Day. I work for a vague and menacing government agency. I could  _ easily _ kill him. Just because my aesthetic is 2nd grade teacher…”

 

“Day?”

 

“You call me Ann.”

 

“As long as you don’t call me Lynn.”

 

“Can I ask a personal question?”

 

“Shoot.”

 

“Are you trans?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Dalyn whatever your last name is, have you been wearing a binder this whole time that is very dangerous.”

 

“Yeah. And it’s Perez.”

 

“Take the binder off, Dalyn Perez.”

 

“I don’t have a sports bra.”

 

“I’m wearing two.” She said, with no explanation. “Here you go.”

 

“Thanks, Ann.”

 

“No problem, Day.”

* * *

 

Remy ran forward to catch Logan as Logan crumpled to the floor. “Lo?”

  
  


“I want Ren.”

 

“The queen?”

 

“No, Ren.”

 

“Harriet?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Em? Can you take care of Logan while I get the palace cook?”

 

“Sure.”

 

“Thanks, hun.” Remy pecked Emile on the cheek, setting Logan by him before running off.

* * *

A loud knocking came from the kitchen grate. Harriet frowned and opened it, revealing Remy Ahmed.

“Remy?”

“Harriet, Logan needs you, can you come?”

“Anything for my son.” they ducked into the vent. “What’s up with him?” they asked as they followed Remy.

“So he liked someone, but he kissed someone else, and the person he likes, or one of the people, is mad.”

“Ooh shit.”

“Exactly! So Logan is having a mental breakdown.”

“And about his ex?”

“Why?”

“Well the ex is probably mad, Remy.”

“Oh yeah. No idea. Definitely mad.”

“Remy, ya take after your father.”

“How do you know my father, I moved here from Jersey City.”

“Just like him.”

* * *

 

“Lolo!” Harriet ran up to Logan, who collapsed in their arms, crying.

“I fucked up, I fucked up, I fucked up, I fucked up, I fucked up,” he repeated.

“I know, Lolo, baby. So the first step is apologizing to him.”

“His name is Dalyn, and I already tried that.”

“Try again, Lolo. He just saw ya being a dick, he’s going ta be mad. But don’t pressure him, he’s going ta be angry, and he doesn’t have ta forgive ya.”

“I know.”

“That-a-boy, Lolo. Now I gotta go, but I’ll see ya, kid.”

“Bye, Ren.”

Harriet smiled at their child and assured themself that what they were doing next was in his best interest.

* * *

 

“So I assume you’re the fine young man head over heels for my son.”

Dalyn looked up. “Who’re you?”

“I’m Logan’s ren.”

  
  


“There’s a quing?”

“Nah, I'm the cook. Though the king did bone me once. What did my son do?”

“I walked in on him kissing someone else.”

“So he was nasty crying when I saw him.”

“Not enough.”

“I’m not saying forgive him right now. I’m saying hear him out when he apologizes. Then decide if you want to forgive him. He’s definitely in the wrong. Even if you weren’t really dating.”

“You aren’t going to say I have to take him back?”

“No. that’s your decision. I will even say that getting back together with him will prove difficult for you because he isn’t monogamous.”

“He isn’t?”

“No excuse for what he did, but no he isn’t.”

“Oh.”

“Is that a problem?”

“No.”

“Good. Hello, girl.”

“Hey.”

“Thanks for helping him.”

“No problem Logan’s Ren.”

“Harriet. Or Harri.”

“No problem, Harri.”

Harriet smiled at them both before walking away.   
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out my tumblr give-me-the-gay


	12. Well Well Well if it Isn't Some Fucking Fluff

“Dalyn?”

 

Dalyn didn’t look up at Logan. “Yes?”

 

“I truly am sorry. I know I shouldn’t have kissed him just… I didn’t know if you would ever date me, and I was stupid.”

 

“Why wouldn’t I date you?”

 

“Because I’m not normal. I can’t even just love one person.”

 

“Lo?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“You are normal. I’m the same way. I just wish you had asked me. Honestly, the angel was pretty cute.”

 

Logan gave a watery laugh, not knowing if it was fake or not. “Thanks, Dalyn.”

 

“Princey?” Dalyn said, keeping his eyes fixated on the dusty ground.

 

“Yeah, bandit?”

 

“Can I kiss you?”

 

“Do you want to?”

 

“Yes. Do you?”

 

“Yeah.” Dalyn looked up and grinned at the prince, slowly standing up, grabbing Logan’s tie and pulling Logan closer.

 

“You sure?”

 

“Just kiss me, dumbass.”

 

Dalyn grabbed the sides of Logan’s face and kissed him hard, moving one hand down to the prince’s waist, and cupping Logan’s cheek with the other, pulling Logan even closer and caressing his cheek. Logan moved his hand into Dalyn’s hair, gently feeling, while the other one lay on the small of Dalyn’s back. Their tongues explored each other’s mouths. When they finally had to break apart, due to the insanely annoying human/monster need to breathe, they lay their foreheads together.

 

“Wow.” Logan breathed.

“Yeah.” Dalyn breathed back.

“I really am sorry Dalyn.”

“I know. I forgive you.” Dalyn pressed another short kiss to Logan’s lips. “I really do.”

“You really are a bandit, Dalyn.”

“How?”

“You stole one of my hearts.”

“You have two? Like the doctor?”

“No, about four.” Dalyn gave a breathy laugh and kissed Logan again.

“I love you. Be my boyfriend?”

“I love you too. Yes. Kiss me again?”

“Yeah.”

* * *

 

“I feel bad.”

“We know you do, Pat. It’s ok.”

“Maybe not! I could have caused Logan’s boyfriend to break up with him!” Patton said, very distressed.

“I wasn’t his boyfriend.” Dalyn said, entering the cave. “Not yet.” he tugged Logan in from the tunnels, their hands linked. “So I need your help.”

“For what.”

“Getting whatever is behind that one cave that he guards.” Dalyn pointed at Remy. “It’s sinister and we have to hide it from the government or whatever. “Even Angelica doesn’t know what it is.”

“Actually I do.”

“Why didn’t you tell me!” Dalyn said incredulously, throwing his hands up in the air, still attached to Logan.

“You never asked.” Angelica gave Dalyn a sly grin.

“You suck. What is it?”

“The key to starting armageddon. A dragon. If it’s released then…” she shook her head.

“Ooh shit. That is bad. We’re still finding it. It could be hurt, or chained up, or worse.”

“I’m helping you.” Angelica declared.

“Me too.” Logan said curling his arm around Dalyn.

“I’ll help.” Emile said. “And so will Remy.”

“Fine, babe.”

“Vee, Pat, and I will help.” Roman said.

“What! No!”

“Please,  _ príncipe oscuro _ .”

“Okay.” Virgil kissed Roman’s cheek.

“I have no objection.” Patton said.

“Okay, good. Because this requires building a boat.” Dalyn confessed. “We have to get over holy water.”

“Or we could steal one.”

“Remy, you’re a guard.”

“So I know where boats are. Duh. It isn’t that hard.”

“Rem.” Logan said.

“Don’t you want to help your best friend? And your boyfriend?” Remy gestured at Dalyn.

“Fine.”

“Remington.” Patton scolded.

“Remy, Pat. It’s Remy. Not Remington.”

“It’s not morally right!”

“You know what isn’t morally right? Ending the world, like they’re going to do. Deal with it!” Remy said, raising his voice.

“Fine.”

“Attaboy. Ready to go?”

“Let’s do it.”

“Dalyn, do you even have a moral compass?” Patton asked.

“It’s a fucking roulette wheel!” Dalyn spun around, laughing, causing his capelet to fly out. Logan laughed.

* * *

As always there was a boat shed. It did not make much sense, because Grand Sumva was a desert town, but it was perfect for them. As long as Dalyn touched the boat it wouldn’t disintegrate. So that is what they did.

They then had to get the boat past the guards. Easy. Dalyn knocked them out.

“Could you not have done that before? Getting in was so awkward.”

“What did you do?” Logan asked.

Dalyn and Angelica both turned bright red. “Nothing!” They chorused.

“Okay?” Logan was suspicious, but he wasn’t going to ask.

Then they pushed the boat out onto the water, getting on it.

* * *

“Hey, did a man pass through here with a motorcycle?”

“Yeah.”

“You have any idea where he was headed?”

“Desert town. Named Grand Sumva.”

“Thank you.”

“Fuck off.”

“Fuck off as well!”

* * *

 

“Where is my son?”

“I don’t know, your majesty! He hasn’t been seen since you said he must get married.”

“He must have run off, the bastard!”

* * *

 

“Well it was easy to get out. Time to find the thief!”

“Yeah.”

* * *

 

“We need to find our other gang member! We need people to be nice!”

“We can’t live without him.”

* * *

 

“Where is the prince! He is needed to discuss the end of the world!”

“I don’t know.”

“Fuck off then!”

* * *

 

“Well, we’re off. Time to find the dragon.”

“Time to save the world.”


	13. Well Well Well What Have We Here? An Anticlimax? Wow What Superb Writing.

The boy stood in a diner. He was not the boy from the cave, but a different boy, because there are several boys in this world. This boy was an asshole, and his name was Remus Duke.

 

He stood in the diner. The diner was in Grand Sumva. He was looking for his brother. Remus didn’t like his brother. Remus also didn’t believe his brother was his brother, because Remus is transphobic, which is a fancy word for a complete dick who deserves to die. Remus was a dick for many other reasons too, but this is a major one.

 

Remus’ brother is Roman Prince.

* * *

Roman Prince stood on a boat, drifting over holy water. He held his boyfriends’ hands. They were going to find a dragon and try to stop the apocalypse.

Finally they came across an island where a dragon was stretched out. Then it wasn’t a dragon, but a human. A human person.

Nico Spencer walked across their island, pacing. They were fucking tired of this dress. They looked up. Why was there a boat? What the fuck?

“Nico!” Angelica yelled.

“Angel! What’re you doing here?”

Angelica, blushing furiously at the nickname, just yelled back “trying to stop Armageddon!”

“Oh, is that what I’m the key to? Dock then.” they did so, and stepped off the boat one by one.

“Hey angel.” Nico hugged Angelica. “Can I kiss you?”

Angelica turned a brighter shade of red. “Ummm lips or other.”

“Cheek if that’s the only place you’re comfortable.” Nico said, perfectly happy with whatever.

“I’m fine with lips.”

Nico smiled and kissed her.

“Sis?”

“Definitely not.” Nico grinned, looking up before locking eyes with Logan. “Well hello, brother.”

“So, what gender are you?”

“Enby, today. Nice to see you.”

“Where were you the past week?”

“Uh… jail.”

“You got a girlfriend in jail?” Logan raised an eyebrow.

“Yep! It’s not like you got a boyfriend, anyway.”

“Actually…”

“You didn’t!”

Dalyn walked up to Logan and snaked an arm around his waist. “Nico, meet Dalyn.”

“Show off.” Nico said, hitting Logan on the head. “Do you have any clothes, I only have this dress and it is dysphoric AF. Also stops me from shifting.”

“I have a binder.” Angelica said.

“That’s mine!” Dalyn protested.

“And you’ve been wearing it for too long, Day, you dumbass. You can also have the leggings I’m wearing under this dress. Do you have underwear?”

“Yeah. Why do you want to know?” Nico raised their eyebrows, and Angelica hit them.

“Get your mind out of the gutter!”

“No.”

Angelica laughed and pecked Nico on the cheek. Nico laughed.

“Can you help me get the dress off, I can’t get it off on my own.”

“Sure.” Angelica helped Nico pull off the dress and Nico sighed, shortening their hair into an undercut and flattening their chest.

“Wait I can shift into clothes.” Nico shifted into black skinny jeans, an MCR tee, and a leather jacket. Angelica laughed again, smiling at their SO.

“So. Let’s get me out of here.” Nico said, shifting large black and red wings onto their back, the typical attire for being the prinx.

They stepped back onto the boat, Angelica and Nico softly chatting at the helm.

“Dalyn, I have a problem.” Logan said, setting his head on Dalyn’s shoulder.

“You like Virgil, Patton, and Roman.”

“Yeah.”

“Same. Want to ask them?”

“Yeah.”

“Hey, you three!”

Roman, Virgil, and Patton looked up. “Yeah?” Roman said.

“Can we join your relationship!”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Epic.” Dalyn said walking over to join them.

Logan turned around to stick his tongue out at Nico. Nico just laughed and said jokingly “no fair, I’m not polyam!” Logan just laughed, walking over to join his boyfriends.

“So I guess we’re going back to my cave?” Remy said. Everyone responded in the affirmative, so Remy took them to a small tunnel that led to his cave. They traveled through the tunnel rather quickly.

As they travel through the tunnel let me give you a small poem.

Life fucking sucks.

I’m going to kill my sibling.

I have no clue why I just did that, especially because Logan is  _ not _ proud of that poem. It’s his worst by far, and that’s saying something, because he is very out of touch with emotions.

They arrived at the cave.

“That was anticlimactic.” Roman said.

“Yeah.” Dalyn said. “Can I have a kiss?”

“Sure.” Roman grabbed Dalyn’s shoulders and pulled him in for a passionate kiss, Roman’s teeth grazing Dalyn’s lips, causing him to let out a small moan as their boyfriends shrugged and Virgil decided to kiss Logan. Roman’s hands traveled over Dalyn’s body, making sure to stay on his back, as Dalyn wrapped a hand in Roman’s long-ish hair, tugging slightly to make Roman moan. It was a bit heated for a first kiss, but neither minded.

“Well well well. I thought my sister liked boys.” a voice rang through the cave. Dalyn and Roman pulled back to see Remus smirking. He let out a fake gasp. “And my dear Jessica. Cheating? I thought you were better.”

“I’m pretty sure you stabbing me in the back was a good enough breakup.”

“I never said it was.” Remus took a step toward them, and Roman pulled Dalyn closer. “Dear Rachel. Kissing a girl. I thought you were straight.”

“I’m gay. And male. And so is he.” Roman nodded at Dalyn.

“Hahaha, no. Mom wants you back, Rache.”

“Remus.” Dalyn stuttered.

“Yes, Jess?” Remus laughed at the accidental rhyme.

“Did you even ever love me?”

Remus laughed. “Nope.”

“Hey, asshole.” Remus turned around to face Nico. “Go die.” they turned into a jaguar and snarled at Remus, who ran out of the cave screaming. “There you go.

Now what do we do? Cause Lo, we kinda have to face dad. He wanted this apocalypse.”

Logan sighed. “Let’s do it.”

“Nico, you still owe me a date.” Angelica reminded.

“I’ll take you on plenty dates once I fix this, Angel.”   
  
  
  
  



	14. Another contusion, my funeral jag. Here's my resignation, I'll serve it in drag. You've got front row seats to the penitence ball. When I grow up I want to be nothing at all.

The door to the castle slammed open, revealing a very angry Nico. “Dad!” they yelled.

 

_ Oh shit _ the royal guards thought, because Nico was supposed to be in a cave, and was supposed to start the apocalypse tomorrow - no, today.

 

Logan followed his sibling through the door sheepishly, mouthing sorry to the guards as they snarled at them.

 

Nico stormed up the stairs, growing dragon wings. “Dad!” they yelled again, their voice full of malice and hate. “King fucking George come face your child!” they raised their arms and made fireballs appear.

 

The rest of the team walked into the castle, following where Logan and Nico had gone. Remy held Emile in his arms, because Grand Sumva wasn’t exactly wheelchair friendly, and they were also very gay.

 

The king got up abruptly when his supposedly imprisoned child and his son entered his chambers. Nico snarled at him. “Why the hell was I in a cave? This is why I changed my last name!”

 

“You what?!” Logan said as Nico shifted the palm of their hand to be holding a sword.

 

“It’s Spencer now, Lo.” they said, their eyes still fixed on King George. “Why am I the key to the motherfucking apocalypse?”

 

“Afton I-”

 

“It isn’t Afton! It’s Nico! I’m Nico! I’m genderfluid! Fucking deal!”

 

Harriet entered the room, watching them with concerned eyes as their sister Alex followed. Logan’s best friend entered, carrying their boyfriend. Logan’s boyfriends entered. Nico’s girlfriend entered.

 

“Why, Dad?”

 

“Because of the prophecy.”

 

“Oh great, the prophecy!” Nico said mockingly. “What prophecy?”

 

“When the oldest royal, generation z, is released from their cave, they shall destroy the world in a fit of anger and vengeance.”

 

Nico stopped in their tracks. “That’s so… specific. It doesn’t even rhyme. So fate had it out for me? Well, fuck you fate!” they said to the sky, raising their free hand and flipping the world the bird. “I won’t destroy the world!”

 

Nico was right that it didn’t rhyme. King George’s grandfather’s grandfather, King Benjamin, had hired a cheap prophetess, instead of going to Delphi or another highly yelp rated spot to get good rhyming  _ quality _ prophecies.

 

They grinned evilly “Well, father? You want to fucking run?” with a snap of their fingers they were suddenly 10 feet tall, and laughing they stepped over to King George, shoving away the table he was cowering behind.

 

“Please.”

 

“I’m not going to kill you!” they sounded disgusted at the thought. “Just… hurt you a little bit.”

 

“Nico!” Logan yelled, realizing his sibling was not kidding, and was probably going to kill their dad. “No!”

 

“Nico yes.” their raised their sword.

 

“Neeks.” Angelica said. “You can’t hurt him. I know he’s done some fucked up shit, but you have to be better than him.”

 

“Says who?” Nico said, crumpling to the floor, the sword disappearing. Tears started falling down their face. “Why?”

 

Angelica sat next to their datemate, curling an arm around Nico and letting them cry into her shoulder. “No one  _ says _ . But I know you Nico. I know you would regret it. I know you would hate yourself the rest of your life. You’re just angry right now. You won’t be angry for the rest of your life.”

 

“She’s right.” Logan said, crouching next to them. “You don’t want to regret what you do in a fit of passion. You said that to me remember? I mean, you were talking about sex,” Logan glanced at his boyfriends, blushing, but none of them seemed to care, “but you were right. You don’t want to kill dad. He is a shitty person, and a terrible father, but if you kill him, you’ll ruin yourself.”

 

“But…” Nico said, no excuse coming to them. “You’re right, but I just really want to hit something.”

 

“Hit me.” Angelica said.

 

“No! You haven’t done anything wrong!”

 

“Nico, I don’t mind.”

 

“I’m not going to hit my girlfriend! Hit on her, maybe, but not physically hit her!”

 

“Whatever you say.” Angelica said, a lovestruck grin on her face. “Wanna get up?”

 

Nico nodded, so she peeled away from them and offered her hand, which Nico took, but they also used the table to steady theirself, accidentally hitting a button labeled “Armageddon”.

 

Nico looked at the button and her face contorted with fear. “Oh fuck!” she said. “Maybe that prophecy was right.”

 

Angelica wrapped her arms against Nico, who didn’t cry, only stood there in a state of shock.

 

Logan retreated to his boyfriends, all of who were hugging and accepted him in instantly.

 

Remy held Emile closer, fear apparent as he stared at the wind picking up outside, opaque white wind.

 

Harriet grabbed their sisters hand, for romantic love isn’t everything.

 

A man driving home crashed his car and died as the car was covered in the white wind. We do not care, for he was Remus Duke and a transphobe.

 

In a cell two men grabbed each other’s hands. They did not kiss or any of their usual fits of passion. They said “I love you” for the first time.

 

In the same cell a man that hardly ever spoke said “Shit.” as the wind engulfed him. And then he screamed.

 

A gang of the nicest people you know exchanged “I love you”s and stood, waiting calmly for death.

 

A king surveyed his country dying from the tallest tower in his castle. He did not believe he could die.  As the wind surrounded him, he did die, for no one is immortal, especially not the people who believe they are.

 

“I love you.” the false prince said to his boyfriends.

 

“I love you too.” they chorused. They did not care that they had only known each other for a day, for they were about to die, and time is meaningless. Time is shit. Huge piles of shit. Time is completely fake and nothing you do can change that.

 

Everyone clung to or thought of the person they loved as the world ended. And it did end. Finally the white wind covered Grand Sumva’s castle, and the world was no more.   
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry? It ain't over yet though


	15. Once Upon A Dream

Nico woke up panting, a strangled scream only  _ just _ caught in their throat. They took some deep breaths and put on their glasses, looking around the basement. 

 

Their brother lay on a mattress with his four boyfriends. Nico smiled seeing how cute they were. So they were there.

 

Logan’s friend Remy lay curled around their boyfriend Emile. So they were also there.

 

Nico looked down at her girlfriend Angelica nestled in her arms. Her too.

 

So they were all there. Thank fuck.

 

“Nico?” Angelica muttered. “You okay?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Yeah as in ‘yeah, I'm good’ or ‘no, but if I distract myself I’ll feel better later, so yeah’.”

 

“The latter.”

 

“Ok, cutie,” Nico blushed at Angelica’s comment “just turn down the brightness on your phone.”

 

“Of course, angel. Love you.”

 

“Love you too.”

 

“Don’t dream.”

 

“Same back.”

 

Nico smiled lovingly at Angelica and kissed her forehead.

 

So it was all a dream. A dream it was unlikely Nico would ever forget.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I hope that was good end. Go follow me on tumblr, give-me-the-gay

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comment please!


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